Use active, optimistic language. Avoid negative words even if the key message is positive (e.g. “No better hotel app available”) as this may subliminally influence readers, especially on a quick skim-read.
Avoid: Not just a place to sleep…It’s a place to dream of.
Try: More than a place to sleep…It’s a place to dream of.
Avoid: The Garden Restaurant is closed for renovations until 30 August 2014.
Try: Our newly refurbished Garden Restaurant will re-open on 30 August 2014.
Avoid: This update has fixed the bug that caused the app to crash on loading.
Try: We’ve enhanced our app to make it faster.
Avoid: The reservation you’ve selected cannot be managed online. Please call our guest assistance team on 1-800-560-7843 to resolve this problem.
Try: Sorry. This reservation can only be managed by phone. Please call us on +1 800 560 7843.
Avoid: The Arizona Biltmore hotel cannot guarantee seating availability for Afternoon Tea without reservations.
Try: Book here and enjoy Afternoon Tea at Arizona Biltmore.
Emphasize positive, collaborative solutions without necessarily highlighting the problem.